Messy

...freedom is messy. I always thought that bondage was messy and freedom was neat, but I think it’s really the opposite. Bondage keeps you tight. Shackles, chains, bars, ropes, all these things are restrictive. They put tight, defined lines around you. There’s a clear boundary. Freedom, on the other hand, has no restrictions. Once all that stuff is broken off, all your mess goes flying. And over time, it gets cleaned up, but it’s not a nice, neat little life. It’s messy. It’s crazy. It changes you. And a world without boundaries is big and messy. A world with boundaries hurts, but the restrictions keep you in line. Keep you ‘safe.’ Freedom means you give up that safety. You put yourself out there to maybe get trampled on. You start flying and then something happens and you land. In bondage you can’t see light often. You see shadows made by light and you want it, but you aren’t sure. In freedom, there’s darkness that tries to follow you, but you can choose to keep lights on. In bondage, you’re so chained up that you can’t really move. In freedom, you move so much that sometimes you fall. In bondage, you don’t know about mountain top experiences with God, because all you know is your cage. In freedom, you climb mountains, but you are well acquainted with valleys and plains and all kinds of topography and terrain. Freedom is just that. You’re free to cry, laugh, dance, sing, walk, run, fly, fall flat on your face and get up again, to struggle, to forgive, to yell and to praise. Freedom is glorious, but it’s messy. You’re never the same again. You suffer and you delight. You pound your fists and you soar with wings like an eagle. It’s a crazy, crazy life and, yes, it’s uncomfortable at times. A lot of times. It’s not a promise of security. You want security, you stay in your shackles. They’re about as secure as you can get, believe me, you try to take those off yourself, they’ll get tighter, and you won’t be going anywhere. That’s pretty damn secure. Freedom isn’t safety. It’s messy. It’s big and wild and something that can’t even be put down in words. Sometimes you’ll feel like everything in freedom is a big muddled ball of chaos. That’s okay. Because the Light is all around you. And he knows. He put you in freedom to begin with. So he’s going to be there in the mess. The Light is in the mess, in the freedom. Be free.